20 Things I Have Learned Since My Son Was Diagnosed With Autism | Shawna Wingert

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6. Sometimes, doctors know exactly what we need. Sometimes they don’t. Either way, only go to a doctor who sees you as a valuable partner in your child’s health and progress.

Like when I realized that he has, without even really trying, learned the scientific name for every single fish at the aquarium and every single plant at the gardens. It’s like glimpsing something sacred, something completely beyond me.

10. Fixations serve a purpose. They are a valuable way for our children to connect with the world. And our kids are often wicked smart because of them.

11. Most of my grief is my own, not my son’s. Letting go of all the expectations I have about being his mother is one of the most difficult parts of all of this. My son does not share these expectations — not even a little. So the problem most often is me. Not him.

I try to just work on one thing at a time, until it is a habit, and then move on to the next. Trying to do all the things at the same time does not help anyone, and just causes stress for every single person in our house.